ext_58239 ([identity profile] elfscribe5.livejournal.com) wrote in [personal profile] thrihyrne 2008-03-08 10:03 pm (UTC)

Hi Thevina,
I'm finally getting around to starting with your fic at the beginning. I have to say this is one of the best fanfics I've read in a while. Your writing is fantastic. Things I loved: your one-word opening with its foreshadowing; your voice for Ashmael; your use of language:
"Ondin sneered, pleasantly. "You're one to talk, tiaharr-steady-aruna-diet-of-Euclase.""
"Vaysh was a sword, clothed as a sylph."
"I marveled that one day I'd simply fly apart into a dazzling shower of opalescent sentience before being absorbed back into the ceaseless song of the universe."
"Vaysh's face was a geometry of promise, the topography of desire."
"When we first take aruna — and we will, Ashmael, have no doubt," he said, his voice roughened with cigarettes and palpable desire, "it is I who will seek out your depths. I'll sink into your mossy glens, and then you'll truly know the fullness of destiny."

Those are just a few examples among many that I admired.

Your story fits so well in the Wraeththu world. Appreciated that you are exploring questions raised by Storm's conception about male/female, the eager desire to learn and explore what it means to be har.

Thanks for posting on raythoo. Mind if I friend you? I'm a LOTR fanfic writer too, though I've delved into Mary Renault's The Persian Boy and Ellen Kushner's Swordspoint.
I look forward to reading the rest of this - as I get a chance.

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